Dear You!
We haven't talked for 10 days now... I haven't heard from you .. and I feel like it is the wisest choice for now not to come and talk to you...
You'll come when you're ready .. and if you didn't .. then .. it is simply what it is...
Let me tell you about today .. or what seems like every day...
Get up early .. coffee .. taking some time to actually wake up .. then .. lose time in making a total mundane list of things that don't actually change anything .. dance a little .. read a little .. eat .. do something either reading or stupid .. watch something .. then sleep I guess...
I want to write to you about the sun .. all I think I need is to collect light .. and shed them somewhere else... I value the sun .. but what about you??
These days things are feeling different .. I'm finally grasping what has happened since I started 'being' .. I'm coming to terms with a lot of things .. or releasing memories of my childhood .. my real anger, disappointments, and harsh judgment .. freeing my self from everything .. and it is taking time .. and energy. It is taking me more energy than I expected it to...
You know, when you release yourself from pain .. it takes energy too .. and it takes something else .. it takes time for you to release that you actually shook off, and recognize the room that you just emptied from your old baggage .. you feel like you're entering a new place .. that from a very far memory, is slightly recognizable...
I think I'm sleeping too much...
We change when the sun comes in .. deep in our darkest rooms...
Light is escaping through the holes I have.. you know, the ones I got through the different wars I fought (so far) .. they are cleaning me up .. it is always gonna be a mess within .. but I'm fine with it .. now I actually realized that I'm fine with it .. or I'm gonna be...
and I'm not in a hurry.. :)
Eventually, I'm coming to terms with the new storms on the horizon. I know, I'll fight, I might win, and I might lose .. but the numbers of the wounds I'll get mean only that there is gonna be more light inside...
And I collect light...
What about you, what are you collecting nowadays??
Love!
Me!
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